This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
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