No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
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