I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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