Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be still, my beating vagina.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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