i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I lost the right to judge tonight
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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