Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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