i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
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So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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