We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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