i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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