My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
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