Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
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Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize