And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize