i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
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i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
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in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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