we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize