I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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