Kiss
Puke
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
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You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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