please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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