she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Randomize