My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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