well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
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Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
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She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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