you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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