is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize