I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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