If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
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