The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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