I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
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how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
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If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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