I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize