They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
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