So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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