So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize