Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
I wish I only lived at night.
Everything about him screamed your future.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Randomize