I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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