Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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