Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
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