I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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