How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize