When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize