You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
My vagina just recognized that song.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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