Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
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