I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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