Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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