omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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