Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize