Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize