I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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