I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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