This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize