Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
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All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
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I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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