OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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