my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
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